Iron Man: I seen it!

Saw the Movie

Oh yeah! Totally forgot to mention the whole Iron Man thing.

It was a decent movie. I was surprised by the good reviews for it. I mean, it was an action/adventure, Superhero movie, you know? Anyway, the free tickets.

So yeah, a few months ago The Girl got these ticket coupons at work in lieu of a tip. Well, in lieu of a cash-money sort of tip, as it were. Well this was good and bad. Firstly it was good, because this was the free trip to see Iron Man, thereby alleviating the frustration of waiting to see it on Blu-Ray. Yay! Movie night out, and a decent show at that!

The movie was very appealing visually. I thought the special effects that they used were very well done. Contrast this with I Am Legend (not), which couldn’t special effect its way out of a paper bag. The story good enough, and even had a moral point that is completely relevant to today’s politics. And there was hot chicks, yeah baby! Many online have lauded Mr. Downey’s acting on the piece as worth the price of admission alone. I would say he didn’t screw anything up, and in fact wasn’t bad at all, but I’m not going to go so far as to say that it’s on par with Christian Bale’s rendition of Bruce Wayne in the new Batman franchise or anything, huh?

My only real gripe about the movie was that it was short. I mean it was slightly over 2 hours, but it felt short, and the end felt rushed. They could have used more of Iron Man in action, I felt. That would have been super-cool, they had pulled off the visuals right, they should have put more on the screen, you know? Give us 30 more minutes of Iron Man doing Iron Man stuff. We’ll love you for it!

Overall, I’d have to say that it’s a flat-B movie, on the verge of B+. Give us more action in the Blu-Ray release, and I’ll give you the coveted “+”.



The Bad side of the free tickets
Oh yeah, remember that? There was a downside to the free tickets. You see, these tickets were a $30 value, and included more than admission. We also got 2 large drinks, a large popcorn, and a large candy (which was medium at best, who are they trying to kid?) I didn’t have a problem with the popcorn or candy, but the drinks? Oh my, the drinks.

I damn near missed the last half of the movie. I had to pee so bad. I was doing the pee-pee dance in my seat. I had to tinkle oh so very badly. It was not right. I mean, where do they get off giving people drinks so big that they only serve to test the outer limits of your bladder?

Thankfully I did make it through the movie without peeing myself. Made it all the way to the bathroom actually, which I was very proud of. And there I peed so long that I almost fell asleep. You seen A League of Their Own? Yeah it was like Tom’s "performance" in that, except longer and without the breaks. It was an amazing feat, you should have been there.



Definitely worth the wait on Blu-Ray though
So about 10 minutes into the movie, the movie stops. The lights come on, the pre-movie stuff starts playing. Again. People in the audience were like, “is that it?” Yes you idiot, you paid $9 to see 15 minutes of movie and not ONE single Iron Man suit. Jeez people are dumb sometimes. DAMN!!!!...

Anyway, it starts back up once they figure out that they broke it (not sure how). The only thing was I think we missed 30 seconds to a minute’s-worth of movie. They were on the same scene, but different characters were on the screen than before, and in mid-sentence of something that I didn’t catch. Maybe Iron Man was gay? I just don’t know for sure now, and might not until it comes out on disc.



The VERY VERY End of the movie: Easter Egg?
I heard that if you wait past all the credits, there’s like a gold mine or something. A very cool gag-reel or something like that. Well they lied. There was something, but it was not really worth waiting for. So I’ll just spoil it for you right now, save you the time.

At the end, Iron Man comes home to Samuel Jackson, who’s the leader of SHIELD, the agency that tried to help cover up the tracks of Iron Man. He wants to talk to him about joining a program called “AVENGER.” This is comic book gold apparently, if you care. I don’t. They’ll either make a sequel or they won’t. Time will tell, not some slop at the end of the credits.

Peace.