BP. Just, Wow. Wow.

Are we over it yet? I mean, really. Does “Electric vehicles” really sound all that bad now? If this had to happen, I’m glad it happened in the southern states, all the ones who supported the whole “drill baby, drill” schlep. How sad.

Take a look at these pics. Just birds mind you, but can you imagine? What’s it spewing out, 3-5,000k barrels a day of this stuff? This is what happens with corporations, this is what happens when you put profit – a $number in front of the ‘human’ & environmental components – you sully everything around you including your name & your very reason for existence.

I hope British Petroleum burns in oily hell. And I hope all that support “drill baby, drill” above “let’s innovate our way out of oil dependency” get to join them. What’s so bad about being labeled Green? Sure seems to trump being covered in reddish-brown death.

We're not fat we're double portions of healthy!

I read an article on the New York Times about fat people pushing back on the Healthcare Debate. Saying that it’s a stereotype and that you can be fit at any size and/or weight.

Apparently a movement started by a lady in San Francisco:

Marilyn Wann is an author and weight diversity speaker in Northern California who has a message for anyone making judgments about her health based on her large physique. “The only thing anyone can accurately diagnose by looking at a fat person is their own level of stereotype and prejudice about fat,” said Ms. Wann, a 43-year-old San Franciscan whose motto in life is also the title of her book: “Fat! So?”

I don’t understand the debate. Why are we “pushing back” against the healthcare debate? You’re fat. You’re at higher risk of about every known condition because of it. The expenses to keep you “healthy” — or rather, “alive” — are astronomical compared to “thin” people. It’s not a question, it’s a fact. There’s no debate.

Here's from the same article, a few paragraphs down:

Extra weight brings with it an increased risk of chronic disease, medical experts say, and heavier people tend to have medical costs that are substantially higher than their leaner counterparts.

Come clean, lady: we’re “starting” this debate so you can feel better about yourself, right? Because you’re not fat, you’re big-boned!

I’d say “get over it” but that’s quite a task for a fatty. I mean, seriously: just take ownership here. You're excessively overweight and it affects your health. You're having trouble with the self-control required to avoid being that way. I get it. We all have our flaws. But don't blame ME for your fatness, lady. It's not a false stereotype, it happens to be factually backed-up and has severe consequences.

I hate this, I hate it when people are in the wrong but "start a debate" or something, essentially blaming EVERYONE ELSE for their shortcomings; "it's not MY fault, I don't lack self-control, I'm NOT FAT, YOU ARE ALL TOO SKINNY AND YOU'RE THE UNHEALTHY ONES! SO THERE! NANANANA!!"

Whatever. Grow… Nevermind. Don't grow. Shrink.

Indiana Jones and the Search for a Better Plot

I like the Indiana Jones adventures from yesteryear myself. Actually I even own the box DVD set. You know, the pretty one with all the artwork and everything? That one. Got it for X-mas about 3 years ago, it was a good gift if even in Full Screen instead of Widescreen.

BUT THIS, the newest one — Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull — I was wholly unprepared for. The amount of suck was so stupendous, that I just shook my head in disbelief for the entire 3 hours it took to completely rape my mind of logic & consistency. It was like a bad, bad Saturday morning cartoon, but without the redeeming qualities such as commercials or entertainment or, hell, both.

I’m not sure I have the room to list everything that is wrong with the film here, but I’m gonna try, so bear with me:

• Everything

Whew! Wasn’t sure I was going to be able to make it through that to the end! And thank you, dear reader, for sticking it through, seeing it take shape and evolve into something bigger than you and me; bigger than the sum of its parts.

That was funny, right? Good. OK now to actually bore you with some of the examples that stand out in my mind. Yeah, sorry ‘bout, kinda misled you there.

Let’s start with the corny way they introduce him. Dumb. We get it. It’s a f*cking INDIANA JONES MOVIE YOU F*CKTARDS, we knew who it was in the car, we saw the hat, the overdrawn overdramatic scene was F*CKING ANNOYING to anyone who’s even old enough to remember reruns of the series on TV.

Then there’s the next scene. Dumb. Because if the thing is magnetized so much that throwing gun powder in the air causes it to float, then BY GOLLY, other metal things will be just as susceptible — like, ALL the metal nails in ALL the boxes in the damned warehouse, or maybe all the metal in all the guns? Yeah.

And did we see him survive a catastrophic ATOMIC BOMB by putting himself inside of a refrigerator? And somehow HIS REFRIGERATOR was the ONLY thing that managed to fly out of ground zero.

The CGI was atrocious throughout. I can’t figure out why it is that a 15-year-old movie — Jurassic Park — is still the standard-bearer for special effects in movies. Just ridiculous.

And slightly connected to that thought: freaking monkeys?!!? Were they serious? I was supposed to buy that scene? Ladies & Gentlemen, Boys & Girls, if you didn’t know what a Dues Ex Machina was before today? Now you do.

The whole movie felt like a train wreck that was happening at high-speed. It never slowed down enough to really try and have a plot, which I guess is good in a sense for them seeing as how they didn’t really have one, just sort of had a bunch of Dues Ex Machinas strung together with a bullwhip for posterity. And have I mentioned Sh!t Lebarf?

Yeah. He’s there. So, uh, if you haven’t yet, obviously don’t bother. Just read this intsead, yeah? If you have already? I’m sorry. I’ll see you at the meetings, guys.

Arts Alive: the tale of why I avoid large crowds

It’s not that I don’t enjoy going out for a night on the town, and it’s not that I don’t enjoy good company. I guess it’s just my nature, that I don’t particularly like large gatherings. Why? Take a look at this guy:

To be clear, we were not out at a “The Dark Knight Fan Club Meeting.” We were not out at a “Long live Heath Ledger” memorial group. It was Arts Alive night, a once-monthly get-together in Old Towne, when most of the businesses host walkthroughs and offer snacks, and everyone comes out to enjoy the atmosphere & festivities.

AND, apparently, wear ‘disturbed clown’ make up to showcase the fact they haven’t been hugged enough yet. So here you have it, the reason why I don’t like large get-togethers: people acting like absolute idiots and attention whores, putting so much time & effort into appearances & act, that is supposed to somehow show that they don’t care what anyone thinks… yet they spent more prep time for the event than anyone else and bothered to make sure they showed up so you could see them and they could let you KNOW they don’t care man.

I like crowds that are small enough to weed out the stupidity; I like crowds sized right, so that everyone is being themselves and sharing in the experience, not making such an effort so prove they’re not making any effort.

I’ve been here two years, and this is really the first time that my schedule has lined up to allow me to go to one of these things. How was it? Some of the art was kind of cool, and Old Towne is pretty neat in its own right. In fact I took a good bunch of pictures while there. But I don’t need 3,000 other people there to enjoy it, maybe just a handful of friends. So if I don’t get out there for another two years? That’s fine. I’ve got a new house to chill at anyway. 

We should all be outraged by this news. OUTRAGED. Mattel had lead-tainted toys being pulled off the shelf left and right a couple of years ago, we throw a “protect the children law at the situation to test children’s toys, and then… they secretly exempt the company responsible for the application of the law from being subject to the law.

Not that I had reason to buy any Mattel toys, but I’m boycotting them. And hell, the government too. This is total HORSESH*T.

Spread the word. holy f-ck.