Oldest, Least Funny Joke in HISTORY

OK so let’s set the stage: You’re outside washing your car or truck or van or horse & buggy, right? Someone, probably a neighbor or three, or maybe some guy that isn’t even from around your parts, sees you.

What’s the punchline?
“Hey you want to wash mine next?” or something similar.

Hey look, it’s not funny. It’s not cute, it’s been done before, probably a couple of times at least just today before you yourself said it again. It’s telegraphed, too easy to spot, and the polite smile & chuckle you get in return is actually code for “die you flaming moron.”

If you want to handle the situation even remotely well, avoid this classic “joke.” Maybe just mention that the car/truck/van/horse & buggy is looking clean, maybe even mention that yours needs cleaning too, if you must say something about it. Maybe even skip all that and just go for acknowledgement, as in “I see you’re cleaning your car/truck/van/horse & buggy today.”

But whatever it is you do, avoid the “wanna wash mine next” joke. Please. America is depending on you.